Hi. I’m Amber Rochelle. I am an Intuitive Life Coach and Mentor who works with women struggling with their sensitivity.
I help Highly Sensitive and empath women understand their unique gift, maximizing the benefits of it and minimizing the challenges. Through transformational coaching techniques that combine the woo AND the practical, we work together to clear blocks from your path, and help you find your voice in this world. We re-introduce you to your truth and forge a deep connection to your inner compass, so you can trust in your own strength and resilience. Through this work, you will heal the wounds of feeling "flawed," "too much," and "too sensitive" and gain coping skills for emotional overwhelm, so you can feel safer out in the world, and not feel like you have have to hide from all the noise. You will come to remember who you truly are, before the world told you who you were supposed to be.
I am here to be your guide on this journey back home to yourself.
I believe that to be sensitive is a divine gift. I believe that it truly is a superpower. But just like any superhero, you have to understand how to work with your gift, and not against it, or it can destroy you. Most sensitive women are told their whole lives that they are weak, and that they need to "toughen up." I call bullshit on that. When you're sensitive, you have an extra layer of sensing that you have to navigate. You FEEL everything at such a deep level and take in so much from the world around you. Yet, you get up every day, and get dressed, and go to work, and tend to your responsibilities just like everyone else. You carry so many emotions, yet you are there for everyone around you without fail. You are incredibly strong.
My mission is to help as many women as possible heal their relationship with themselves and their sensitivity, and discover how truly powerful they are. Sensitivity is no accident. I believe that the reason we FEEL so much pain, and are tuned into the dark places in this world- is so that we know what needs fixing, what needs healing, and we are so motivated to do something about it. We are born healers, visionaries, and light workers. We just have to learn how to get out of our own way.
For a big part of my life I felt deeply flawed. Growing up, I felt like an alien that didn't belong on this earth. I was different, and the world around me wouldn't let me forget it. I was bombarded with messages like "why are you so sensitive?", "you're so dramatic," "it's not that big of a deal," "are you seriously crying about this?" I got in trouble for calling out the truths that I saw. For speaking the unspoken, for seeing what I was supposed to push under the rug.
As a child, I was constantly scared. I could never relax. I was always scanning and evaluating my environment… looking for things that could hurt me, looking for validation from those around me. Cues and clues from things outside of myself. I remember scanning people’s faces and feeling into their energy- “did I say the right thing,” “do the right thing,” “am I ok,” “am I liked,” “am I safe???”
My stomach was always in knots. My shoulders hunched up to my ears and my arms awkwardly twisted in front of me. It’s like I was trying to turtle into myself. To disappear into an imaginary shell. I felt like I was walking on a tightrope with the weight of the world on my shoulders… one wrong step and BAM! No safety net. No harness. I was SO SENSITIVE that the world felt deafening and dangerous. It was like I had no sanctuary. At school I was tormented by bullies, walking around with like I had a target on my back saying, “tease me, it’s easy to make me cry.” My home life was chaotic and unstable. My family was riddled with addiction, all kinds of abuse, and mental illness. I was often neglected and treated like an emotional punching bag for everyone's issues.
My favorite place used to be alone in my bedroom under the covers with a flashlight and a book. Or sometimes just in darkness. That and the illusion of control were what got me through. Trying to grasp at any semblance of control I could to give me a sense of stability. Yet all it did was lead to perfectionism, workaholism, chronic people pleasing, and codependency. I had all of these, but I never felt safe.
So often, it was reflected back to me that my feelings were somehow "wrong." After years of being criticized, ostracized, and left out for being sensitive, plus having my feelings invalidated over and over again, I began to believe it. I was too much. There was something wrong with me. I felt I was deeply flawed. And on top of that I felt I couldn't TRUST my own feelings, or my own experience of the world. I thought that I had to "toughen up" to fit in and to be loved. To survive, really. I began to push down my feelings, stuff them, and set about the business of "proving" that I was "good enough" to be loved.
I became very outward focused. I drove myself into the ground trying to be perfect, to not get in anyone’s way, to always do what I was “supposed” to do, to never rock the boat, and to make everyone around me as happy as possible. I felt it was somehow my responsibility to make up for my my family member's narcissism, alcoholism, drug addiction, and mental illness. I became a chameleon and used my extra layer of sensing to feel into who I thought I was supposed to become in any given situation. I knew what to do, and more importantly what NOT to do, to make people comfortable and happy or to diffuse any tension in the room. I would use my extra sensory feelers to tune into their emotions and would change my energetic color accordingly. I shed my own skin to try to make others happy, to try to belong. But ironically, this shedding of skin left me even more raw and vulnerable to the world around me. I lost myself. Completely. I was exhausted, depleted, completely overwhelmed, severely anxious and had no idea who I was.
my ROCK BOTTOM:
What kept me going was my innate drive, and the gnawing sense that I just had to "work harder," and somehow everything would be ok. But it wasn't ok. I hated myself. I had the worst inner critic you'd probably ever meet. I hurt myself physically and emotionally as a way to "punish" myself for being so "crazy" and "flawed." But this self abuse also served as a distraction from the real pain; years of feelings pushed so deep down that were screaming to get out, and the real true me- that felt abandoned and drowned out by the deafening noise of demands of the world plus everyone else's needs and feelings. My needs weren't getting met and sooner or later I was going to hit rock bottom and burn out. But first, I made another choice. When I graduated from college, I no longer had a set of rules to follow. No more - you do "this," and you get an "A." Yay- you're good enough! So I unconsciously made a new set of rules for myself- and that turned into an almost decade long battle with anorexia and bulimia.
I was literally eating and then purging my feelings. I would do anything to stop the ocean of feelings inside of me from bursting at the seams. I would hole up in my apartment, down a whole bottle of wine to myself while chain smoking on my front porch, wishing I was someone else, wishing I could be free from the anxiety that chased me every second of my life. And then reaching for the Chips Ahoy, the Cheeze-It's- anything that would stuff down the agony of feeling like I didn’t have a place in this world. And then the wave of release that came when I got rid of it all. Like, literally, flushing my feelings down the toilet. I was shutting myself down from being fully alive.
One day, my best friend threw a fit in an Urban Outfitters. She was screaming at me and crying because I was pissed I couldn't fit into a size double-zero jeans. I was passing out in the gym and having heart problems, yet all I cared about was the number on the scale. She had had enough- everything she'd been wanting to say for years all came out... and I realized in that moment, that I wasn't only hurting myself, I was hurting the people I loved the most. And that's when everything changed.
THE LONG JOURNEY HOME:
Getting help for my eating disorder was not easy, but I have immense gratitude for going through this experience because I literally had to learn, from square one, how to love myself. I had to get to know myself again. To learn how to put myself first and meet my own needs. I had to learn how to heal my relationship with food and my body. But more importantly my relationship with my feelings. I had to heal from the trauma of my childhood. I had to accept that I WAS traumatized. That my pain was real. My experience was real. My feelings were real. That I mattered and that I was good enough and worthy enough. No more proving needed.
This wasn't an overnight process. Healing isn't linear, and it's never really "done" and tied up in a pretty little bow. Life will always throw us curveballs. But what I have gained through doing this work on myself is an unshakeable confidence in my worth, a solid foundation of self care and self love, deep trust in my inner compass and my feelings, and true freedom to be myself in all that I do.
LIVING THE AUTHENTIC LIFE:
With this newfound energy and confidence, and with a mountain of pain, overwhelm, self-loathing, and destructive behavior cleared from me, I realized that I had cleaned inner house- but it was time to clean outside too. After working in the fiercely competitive advertising world of Seattle since college, I began to question my true purpose in this world. Was I really going to spend the rest of my life designing toothbrush ads and ducking into bathrooms to avoid the toxic energy of my coworkers? I knew I was meant for something more. I knew the suffering I'd experienced had taught me so many lessons that I was meant to use to change the lives of others. When I found out "Life Coaching" was a "thing" that people could actually "make a living at", something inside me opened up. I left corporate and haven't looked back. I knew that I had found my true place in this world.
I'm now a graduate of Seattle Life Coach Training, Gabrielle Bernstein's Spirit Junkie Masterclass Level 1 & 2, and Sarah Liddle's Coach School. Additionally, I've trained with dozens of amazing mentors and coaches and completed years of my own therapy and treatment.
After such a long battle and a boat load of healing, I finally found my truth and my place in this world:
I am here to help you shift the darkness to light. I am here to help you heal your relationship with yourself and your sensitivity. To walk you home to yourself. To your truth. To your purpose in this world. And ultimately, to your freedom.
Now, I spend my days speaking, writing, coaching, and teaching. In my cozy home office, I share my message and empower others to embrace their sensitive superpowers. When I'm not working, you'll find me snuggling with my fiancé and two kitties (Twink and Cucu), working out, cooking, and watching movies with close friends. I love makeup and fashion and have an ever growing collection of fabulous black boots. I'm into all things witchy, woo, magical, and fantastical. I attend a festival in Oregon every Summer where I dress up in elaborate faerie costumes that get made Project Runway style in my living room the month before. (Much to the dismay of my man- glitter EVERYWHERE!) I love to travel and be in nature, especially water. (I'm a faerie AND a mermaid, basically). I am surrounded by my loving chosen family and incredible friends. I am happy, I am whole. I love the thin skin I'm in, and I proudly rock my true sensitive colors wherever I go.